The stereotype of empathy and autism must be actively challenged, writes Dr Kim Collett.
When we think of autism, empathy often comes to mind. There is a stereotype that autistic people have no empathy, and that this affects how they understand other people and their emotions. However, this is a flawed and oversimplified assumption.
Empathy itself is a complex notion, and often oversimplified. It is about more than just understanding another person’s perspective, or walking in their shoes. There are other types of empathy besides this typical notion. The ability to share the emotions of others, for example, or to take action on another’s behalf, or to develop deep connections with others. When it comes to autism, barriers to empathy are often linked with understanding the perceptions of others due to the need to read tone, facial expressions and body language. Empathy also requires knowledge of social norms and cultural patterns—the social and cultural rules we are all expected to know but which aren’t explicitly taught or written down. These can be challenging for autistic people, but this doesn’t mean they have no empathy.
Autism can actually cause people to feel the emotions of other people even more intensely than their neurotypical peers, but this is often not acknowledged. We typically assess an autistic person’s reaction by how a neurotypical person in the same situation would react. We assume that if someone is resonating with the emotions of another, they will show them comfort verbally and physically. They may ask if they are okay and give them a hug, as this is what is socially expected. However, this may not be how an autistic person expresses their support. Instead, they may be more inclined towards trying to fix the problem, and a rather more blunt delivery of reassurance. Due to the intense way in which the emotions can be felt, the feelings are more likely to be overwhelming for an autistic person, and they may shut down, withdraw or become quiet. This may then be misread as a lack of empathy. The disconnect and misunderstanding is a mutual issue, as autistic people misinterpret neurotypical people, and neurotypical people misinterpret autistic people.
Assumptions and misunderstandings can lead to people with autism being labelled as uncaring, which may impact their relationships as well as their own wellbeing. It can also mean that any support does not fully take their emotions into account, if it is assumed that they don’t feel emotion. The stereotype on autism and empathy needs to be actively challenged. Schools have a vital role to play, by challenging the deficit narrative around autism, and by promoting the importance of valuing different ways of expressing empathy. Work can be done on teaching others about the many different perspectives, and the many different ways people can experience and react to emotions. But we need to do more than teach autistic people about empathy, and the unwritten social rules surrounding it. We need to make their neurotypical peers more aware and more accepting of alternative ways of showing care. No two people are the same, so not everyone with autism will experience empathy in the same way, but we can start by acknowledging that there are different ways of experiencing empathy and reacting to it. This will help us to accept and respect diversity, and to challenge unhelpful stereotypes.