Your understanding of neurodiversity, trauma, and behaviour strategies can make a huge difference in a teen’s life, says Hayley Attew.
Teenagers sometimes get a bad reputation. People see them as moody, defiant or obsessed with their phones. In reality, they are facing one of the toughest times in life. For teens in foster care, these struggles are made even harder by trauma, uncertainty and loneliness. That’s why fostering teenagers is so important—and why you could make a real difference by becoming a foster carer. There are nearly 50,000 children aged 10+ in care in England, of whom about 21,000 are teenagers aged 16+. One in five of the children aged 12+ experience at least two moves per year between foster homes, which makes their already difficult lives even harder.
Teenagers in care go through the same ups and downs as any other young person—exams, friendships, finding their identity, and planning for the future. But without a stable family, these challenges can feel even harder to navigate. Just like their peers, they need encouragement to stay focused at school, reassurance when things go wrong, and someone to celebrate their achievements. Foster carers provide this vital support, helping young people to feel valued, capable, and ready for adulthood. With the right guidance, these teenagers can grow in confidence, succeed in education, and develop the life skills they need for a brighter future.
Residential homes aren’t always the best option. As an SEN professional, parent or carer, you know that stability and caring relationships are key for a young person’s growth. While residential homes provide structure, they often lack the emotional warmth and one-on-one support that a foster family can offer. These homes can make it harder for teens to form strong, trusting relationships, which are crucial for healing and personal growth. Being part of a fostering family allows teens to experience nurturing care, positive role models, and tailored support. This gives them the stability they need to heal from past trauma and succeed in the future.
Being a foster carer for a teenager isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being there. Teens need someone who will listen without judging, set boundaries, and encourage them when they make mistakes. Building trust takes time, and sometimes progress is slow. You don’t need to have all the answers. By simply being steady and reliable, you can give a teenager the chance to feel valued and understood. Whether it’s teaching life skills like cooking or offering emotional support, your presence could change their future.
Understanding neurodiversity in children in care
Many children in care have neurodiverse conditions like ADHD, autism or dyslexia. If you understand neurodiversity, you can make a big difference in a young person’s life. For a start, you can provide structure. Many neurodiverse teens thrive on routine. A predictable daily schedule can reduce stress and provide stability. You can use trauma-informed care. Understanding how trauma affects behaviour helps foster carers respond with patience and empathy. Clear, simple instructions and a calm approach can help neurodiverse teens feel supported. Similarly, some teens are sensitive to noise, light, or touch. Small changes like using dimmed lights or noise-cancelling headphones can make a big difference. Lastly, many neurodiverse teens need extra help in school. Foster carers can work with schools to make sure these teens get the support they need, such as specialised teaching or assistive technology.
Moving on
If you’re thinking about fostering long-term, or fostering teenagers, you might wonder what happens when a teen turns 18. In the past, young people in care were expected to leave their foster homes at 18. But now, they can stay with their foster family if both sides agree. A team—including the foster carer, social workers, and local authorities—will create a pathway plan to help the young person transition to adulthood. This plan includes support with work, money, and housing. The average age for moving out is 24, and many teens in foster care choose to stay with their foster family even after they turn 18 because they’ve built strong bonds. However, if they feel ready, they can also move into private housing or supported living.