Alex Pagett interviewed a student with autism, and this is what they said.
My morning routine
7:00 My phone vibrates to wake me up. I turn the alarm sound off because it stresses me out too much. I lie in bed and think through my morning. My favourite subjects are: maths and physics, chemistry, art, biology, geography, history, English, languages, and music is my least favourite. I hate being asked to be at the front of class, I get so anxious about it. When I am ready, I go downstairs. I hate the way the uniform feels. I always have Coco Pops, and it has to be in my bowl. The shape is perfect. The spoon fits just right in the bottom so that it gets the milk. My brother is usually annoying in the morning, so I try to ignore him. I’ve recently started to listen to rain sounds when eating. I go to pack my bag. I like to have my stuff in the order of the lessons I’m having that day. My mum reminds me of things too.
8:00 I walk to the bus stop before my brother leaves. I like listening to audiobooks. I always look for my usual seat on the bus. The bus is the most stressful part of the day. People play music or shout to each other. I usually listen to my book and look out of the window. At school, it’s really busy. I am not allowed to wear headphones so this is stressful.
School
8:40 Form time. Getting ready for the day. I like my form tutor but he can be confusing
9:00 Maths is fun, I like that it’s solving puzzles really. My teacher is great and she gives extra problems when I finish early. In English, I worry that I am going to be asked to speak in front of the class. I struggle to follow the older books we read.
11:45 Break time. I go to the library. I love to draw, but sometimes I have to do homework. I feel like I should hang out with people and make friends. People must think I am a loner, but I never know what to say.
12:05 PSHE. Today I felt really tense. I didn’t really listen.
13:00 Lunch is a lot like break time. The canteen is too busy at the start of lunch and I can get my food with less queue if I go later. I eat lunch in the art room, r. Sketch in my notebook, I sometimes sit with a friend at lunch
14:00 Geography. Lessons at the end of the day are hard. I usually feel tired. This building is not very nice either and the lights make a humming noise.
15:50 End of school. I can put my headphones on again.
Heading home
16:20 Home. I like to go to my room and listen to my book or watch some youtube videos. Homework if I have any. Sometimes I just get stuck with it though. I often end up reading about stuff instead of working. At the moment I am learning about authors from the industrial revolution.
19:00 Dinner. Mostly I eat in my room, but eating downstairs is okay if my brother is away. I have to get my stuff ready for tomorrow or I feel stressed.
22:00 I find going to sleep quite hard. I listen to my book, but sometimes the anxiety about tomorrow’s lessons takes over.
I don’t know how to socialise.
I don’t feel like I fit in at school. Most people have a group of friends that they spend lots of time with. I feel quite lonely. I don’t know how to relax with people around.
Alex Pagett comments: I regularly work with students in situations like these. My advice to students and their families like this revolves around reducing the stress and anxiety that come with feeling ‘other’; then we can build up their flavour of social confidence. If large group socialising doesn’t work, that’s perfectly OK. It may be hard to see that at this age, and often, hearing this sentiment from your family doesn’t help as it can seem dismissive. I try to find stories from my life that relate to the student, or, failing this, find similar stories from other people who can be easily admired. Spending time with one or two core friends can be easier and may be more valuable.